Today’s Technical Tuesday episode isn’t technical at all! We are continue to discuss the difference between being proactive and reactive. The difference starts in our language. How we speak to others, but more importantly how we speak internally to ourselves. Check out the website for more content www.bcbousa.com
How we speak to ourselves plays a big role in whether we are a proactive or reactive person. A reactive person speaks in ways that absolves them of responsibility. We speak in ways that blames someone else, or some condition for the way things are without taking any responsibility for our role in it. An example would be “That’s me. That’s just way the I am. I have always been this way.” That creates the illusion that you are not capable of changing which is simply not true. It might not be easy, but we are all capable of changing even the hardest and most enduring habits we have.
Instead of speaking to yourself in a reactive way, try to be more proactive in your speech. A few examples:
Instead of There is nothing I can do say Let’s look at alternatives.
Instead of That’s just the way I am say I can choose a different approach.
Instead of I have to do that say I am choosing to do this.
You always have a choice. When someone says they have to do something what they are really saying is that they are choosing to do it because they don’t want the consequence if they don’t. Instead of framing it in your mind as something you must do, instead frame it as a choice you are making and the reason why you are making it. You still might not enjoy doing it, but at least you are taking control of your decision and your behavior.
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