In a business setting, being rejected hurts. Sometimes it hurts so bad you just want to quit. But ask yourself, Would a successful entrepreneur quit after a simple rejection? Today we cover the interesting (and sometimes hysterical) story of someone who did not quit, but instead put himself through rejection therapy. The basic idea was that for 30 days, you seek rejection. In doing so, you gradually desensitize yourself from the pain, building courage and resolve along the way. Overcoming your fears can lead to getting more of what you want out of life, and learning some valuable lessons along the way.
The story is about Jia Jang and how he felt after being rejected by a potential investor. After starting the rejection therapy game he made over a hundred crazy requests, video recording all of them and posting to YouTube. Over and over, he heard the answer that had become so familiar to him:
Can I slide down the fire pole at this fire station? No.
Can I have a “burger refill”? (“It’s just like a drink refill, but with a burger.”) No.
Can I speak over the intercom here at Costco? No.
Can I attend your Super Bowl party (even though I don’t know you)? No.
Can I have a free room at this hotel? No.
But as time went on, and Jiang’s “rejection quest” continued, something interesting happened.
Although many rejected him right away, to Jiang’s surprise, others actually gave him exactly what he wanted. And with every yes, Jiang gained courage.
A stranger said yes to letting him play soccer in his backyard.
A pilot said yes to letting him make an announcement on a flight.
Survivor host Jeff Probst said yes to singing Jiang’s son a lullaby on nationally syndicated television.
A pilot said yes to brining Jiang up and letting him fly his private plane.
A teacher said yes to allowing Jiang to give a lecture to his college students.
Jiang learned some important truths along his rejection journey. For one, he discovered that if he didn’t run, he could sometimes turn a “no” into a “yes,” using a single, one-word question:
Often, when Jiang asked why (sometimes repeatedly, respectfully, and in different ways), the rejector would rethink the request. Or, they would offer some type of compromise. Or, they would offer something else in return.
For example, after a stranger rejected Jiang’s request to plant a flower in their backyard, Jiang asked why.
“Well, I have this dog that would dig up anything I put in the backyard,” said the man. “I don’t want to waste your flower. If you want to do this, go across the street and talk to Connie. She loves flowers.”
Connie was more than happy to honor Jiang’s request.
The rule of rejection is simply. It’s made up of three parts:
A. You won’t get anything if you don’t ask for it, so don’t reject yourself.
B. If the answer is “no,” ask, “why?” This may lead to you getting what you wanted, or getting something else that’s close.
C. Remember that rejection doesn’t define you. It’s the way you react to rejection that defines you.
So, if you want to overcome your fear of rejection and get more of what you want, don’t run. Remember the rule of rejection.
When you do, you’ll start turning “No” into “Yes.” More importantly, you’ll change the way you view rejection, forever.
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